In this month’s blog, Kathy Elstad shares her own continuing journey of transformation and the discovery of safety in God. Kathy is a retired first grade teacher, teaching children the love of reading and writing has been her passion for over 30 years. She is also a member of Wellspring and an author of several books including her most recent, “A Journey to Faith: A Planting of Seeds.” -Pastor Corey
Finding My New Safe Place
A safe place. I had one, until 2004. My mom and dad both passed away within two and a half months of each other. They and their house of 47 years were my safe place. You know, the place where you are loved unconditionally by people who are always there for you. The place you feel so good, so safe when you walk through the door. But, that place was gone.
I felt so sad, so lost, so overwhelmed. I was grieving, I had the responsibility of the house I loved so much and knew that down the road, I would be losing it. The house was in Brookfield and some of the rooms, the basement and the two in a half car garage were packed floor to ceiling. Plus, I had all their paperwork. I was teaching full time, had my house and family to care for. Yes, I was overwhelmed and sadly to say, I had no relationship with God.
Luckily, my mom and especially, my dad were still there for me. My dad had recently been talking about this Happy Preacher he was watching on TV. My dad enjoyed him. He told jokes, stories and my dad could relate to his messages. One Sunday morning, as I sat on my couch, flipping through channels, snuggled up with a quilt, sipping tea and crying, there he was, the Happy Preacher. He seemed to step into my living room to have a chat with me. He gave me the just right words I needed to hear. He was a gift from God and my dad. So grateful.
His words started me on a journey. A journey to find my new safe place. My journey led me to my new friend, God. Wow! God wanted to be my friend and He wanted to have a relationship with me! How do I do that? I watched, I listened, I read, I learned, and I grew.
This was such a different God from my growing up with God. I was always a little afraid of God. There was sin, hell, confession. Never thought of Him as a friend.
I began thinking about what do friends do? Friends love to talk. I learned God loves me to talk to me about anything, anywhere, anytime — just like I do with my friends. This was so new to me. I thought prayer was reciting memorized prayers from childhood. But, I gave it a go. I shared the good, the bad, the happy, the sad. God listened. I love that God is ALWAYS ready to listen!
On my journey, I learned that God loves me unconditionally. He loves me just where I am but, of course, God has plans for me! God loves to plant “seeds” in my heart, and then, watch these “seeds” and me grow! It makes Him smile watching me progress on my journey.
God is always there for me, to help me, to guide me, to share His wisdom. God will give me everything I need to get me through my day. I believe this to be true because here I am! This makes me feel safe — like I am not alone on my journey.
Recently, I’ve been learning about The Holy Spirit. I’ve always wondered about the Holy Spirit. Mostly, I heard about God and Jesus. I really didn’t know what The Holy Spirit did. Now, I know. The Holy Spirit is actually God on Stand-by. He actually waits for me to need help and then He does! But, there is something I must do. I must ask God/The Holy Spirit for help. They do not like to intrude. They need to be invited , so I do.
God/The Holy Spirit loves to help. But, it’s not always in my time or my way. I do believe that God has the best plan and trust me, God’s plan is always better than mine! I have many not so great plans to prove it! Maybe you do too? So, I wait patiently (sometimes) believing, trusting and having faith in God.
Moms and dads are always sharing their wisdom, hoping to help and guide their children. They want to help them not make mistakes. Actually, I should say trying to help them and guide them. Children don’t alway choose to listen to mom and dad. God loves to share His wisdom with me — and with you too. Again, it’s our choice whether we listen to God or not. Over the last 16 years, which is how long I have been on this journey, I have learned that it is wise to follow God’s wisdom, not that I always did. But… following His wisdom, His plan makes my life better, happier, easier. Probably, following some of my mom and dad’s wisdom would have been better too.
I realized that God loves me unconditionally — like my mom and dad. God is always there for me — like my mom and dad. He loves to share His wisdom — just like my mom and dad. I feel safe again! I don’t feel alone. So, I have discovered that God is my new safe place.
I’m so grateful to have a safe place again and so grateful for all I have learned along the way. It’s exciting that my journey will not end. Every day I continue to grow and change. I believe that is what God wants. He made us human. He knows we will make mistakes and that we have a lot to learn in our lives. I know I did and do. I didn’t know much about the Bible. Now, I know it’s God sharing His wisdom with us. God is sharing His promises to us. I know I have SO much to learn. Maybe, you are on your journey or maybe, you are beginning one. No matter where you are, God is with you, by your side! My favorite phrase — God’s got my back! He’s got yours too! Feel Safe!